Please stay away from me! I don't know what it is about me, but I have had quite a few married men hit on me in the last few years. Now, while it may be flattering to have someone interested, this is not what I am looking for. I don't know if perhaps I am putting something out there (I really don't think I am by the way), but married men seem to be the only men interested in me.
A few years ago I went to a conference for work where I met a very interesting man. We spent much of the conference together, talking (I promise!!) and we did have drinks with his father who was also there. When I returned home, this man proceeded to call me all the time and even went so far as to send me flowers and a birthday present! And while I haven't heard from him in a while, every now and then he pops up and asks how I am doing. You know what? i would be doing better if you left me alone!
I also met another man through work who I was very intimidated by. He worked for an organization that I was very interested in and we got to work and travel together (with other people) for a project. Eventually we became friends and shared stuff about our personal lives. I heard all about his wife and daughter and was really feeling like we were good friends. Until he came to New York for a work conference and we went to dinner. It was there he told me that he was feeling things for me he knew were wrong and that he didn't know if we could be friends anymore. I told him that was fine and I understood, although I really didn't. Had I done something to give him the wrong impression? This was someone in my field whom I respected and liked as a friend. Time has passed and we will check in every couple of months just as friends. But there was a period there where I was like, "WTF?!"
Recently, we had another event for work and I was introduced to the people from the venue who I would be working with on my part of the event. I became friendly with one of them and we went out for drinks. Then he started calling me, telling me I was beautiful, and making things a little uncomfortable. Finally, yesterday I sat him down and told him nothing was ever going to happen. That is not what I am looking for, and he is a good person and I know it is not really what he wants either. He agreed and while we probably won't be friends, I do wish him the best as he does me.
But really, that is way too many married men!! I know my accomplice (and some friends) will be mad I never told them some of this stuff. I guess I was embarrassed. I really was feeling like I did something wrong and while I know you won't judge me, I was scared. I am just hoping in the future that the men I meet will be single and the married ones will know their place!
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5 comments:
So Creepy! You didn't do anything wrong, and you have no reason to be embarassed...they just can't resist the junk in your trunk! You also forgot to include the creepy group of married men that tried to get with us in Saratoga...gross! You seem to be a magnet for them...much like I'm a magnet for lesbians and old men...
Of course no one would judge you. You didn't do anything wrong. There is nothing wrong with hoping for a friendship with someone. If they misinterpret that, or choose to hit on you knowing they are married, that's on them, not you.
Men think with a part of their body that we as women can never hope to fully understand. As such we must remember that while we can sit down and have a good old time with someone just to have a good time, a man who goes out for drinks with you or hangs out with you a lot will start to interpret things in a way you do not desire.
While you have done nothing wrong, I also think you probably let your guard down and have a relaxed and good time when you are around married men, you are probably more uptight and not as much "fun" when you first meet a potential single guy. Moral here is to relax and let the real you shine through no matter what!
Girl, I totally feel ya!
I started dating this great guy. I fell hard and quick. After about 5 months we decided to move in together. I moved in and a few days later his wife came banging on the door.
I guess what happened was they were legally seperated. She cheated on him and "fell in love" with another man so she left to be with him. Well once she figured out this guy wasn't loaded and couldn't take care of her she came back and my boyfriend took her back! He told me that he loved us both and maybe we could all "have fun" with each other and she and I could be friends. WTF??
Married men are the worst...they're even worse when you don't know they're married.
I have had the same experiences...make me nervous to actually get married and find the one. Are they all like this...I don't think so, but makes your question.
OH! I forgot to tell you...I nominated you for an award-it's up on my blog!
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