Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Meet the Parents

So this past Friday I met M's parents. Before the actual meeting, I had been talking to M about it and I told him how I wasn't nervous but rather I was excited. Mainly because I felt that meeting the parents makes this all the more real. It is one thing for M and I to talk about our relationship when it is just the two of us, but it is something else to introduce our families into it as well. So, off we went to NJ where his parents prepared a dinner that they picked up from somewhere else. It seemed funny to me that they were so relaxed that they didn't bother to make dinner for their son's new girlfriend, but rather just brought it in. It didn't really matter to me either way and M did let me know that's probably what they would do, so I wasn't surprised. What I was surprised about was the state of the house in general and the fact that his mother was wearing sweat pants and a t-shirt (while I changed twice to make sure I looked nice). The house itself was something out of 1974, and with just a few more piles of stuff could be a contender for "Clean House" on the style network (it isn't bad enough to be on "Hoarders"). It made me a bit nervous that M would be like that, but he assured me that while he likes to keep certain things, he can't stand the way his mother keeps the house and he and his dad talk about it all of the time. All that aside, I tried to just focus on getting to know his parents and letting them get to know me a bit as well.
Dinner was fine and I think the conversation was very easy. There were a few questions about what I do and where I am from. I will say that his mom asked me a few times if I ever think about moving back to Miami. I answered honestly that it would be nicer to be closer to my family, but that I have no plans to do so at this time. What I found funny is that she kept on asking about it, like she is scared that I would take M away from his family. It was a little strange, but not as awkward as when the issue of Thanksgiving came up. M mentioned it and how I would be meeting certain people to which his mother responded "Aren't you going home for Thanksgiving?" Apparently, she had no idea that M had asked me to come spend it with him and his family. He had asked his dad, but I guess the information never got to his mom. M has told me that he has a very close relationship with his dad and that his one with his mother is a bit more strained, so I guess this was my introduction to that.
But, in the end, I think the whole night went well. Both of his parents were really lovely to me, they both said I was welcome to come over anytime and that they enjoyed meeting me. So, things (I think) were all good at the end of the night. What do you think?
Now, its onto meeting my parents, who are coming up in December!


MCW said...

I think it sounds like a normal 1st meeting...I guess they could have dressed up a bit? I think it's a good sign that M warned you of the odd things before you got there. And any mother would be worried that her son would spend holidays away from her. I feel that way about my little brother :)

Moe said...

Hi, I randomly stumbled across your blog today. First meetings can be SO stressful. Getting to know your significant other's family can be really hard....especially trying to find how you fit into it. It just takes time. I'm glad they were nice :)


Dee Stephens said...

First meetings can be stressful. I think the questions about moving and Thanksgiving are normal too.
Not having dressed up would have bothered me too but oh well. It is what it is.
Just remember this -- something my mom has engrained in my brain from a small child.
"You marry the family"...

The Frisky Virgin said...

I agree with Dee--my mom has always told me to look at his family because you marry them as well. She also said to look at his father--your bf or possible husband will likely be just like his dad later in life.

Everything sounds relatively normal, although the not dressing to meet you is a little strange... but it could be they are just really relaxed people and didn't want you to feel tense. His father not telling his mother about Thanksgiving is pretty interesting. Could be he just forgot, but it could also be that they don't talk about things as regularly as you and M do??

I don't know...I'm just trying to throw out thoughts that would enter my mind. :/ I hope that is okay.

Cinderita said...

OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH! You met his parents! and it went GREAT! They loved you! Of course they did! HOORAY FOR YOU!!!!!!! Ohhhh this is going so well. Makes me so happy!