I finally got matched via the matchmaking site with someone I thought might be interesting. He was a little older than me and seemed like we had alot in common. I agreed to the match and waited for him to call. So, "D" called over the weekend and we started the usual getting to know you conversation. We talked about what we are doing (he is going back to med school after working on Wall Street for the past few years), I told him about my work for a non-profit and my longing to move on to something new. Now for those who know me, you know that I love my field and I love the work I do, but the place I am in is not a good fit and it is time to move on. I didn't get into the negative stuff with D, just explained that I was ready for a change, but loved my work. He mentioned moving into private sector work and I wondered if that was something I would be welcome in considering my specialized degree. His next words to me?
"Yeah, you're not very marketable."
What?! Woah, how do you know what my work skills are? I was totally offended, but decided to make light of it and chalk it up to just awkward phone talk. The conversation continued with D making more suggestions for my employable future and when I referenced his "marketable" comment in a joke, he didn't laugh. This was not going well. I ended the conversation when he condescendingly told me he was glad I had SOMETHING to do that night and wasn't sitting home alone (I promise, his tone was not friendly). Well, that's conversation was over and that match is now closed! Time to move on. But it did get me thinking....
Am I marketable? And I don't mean for jobs because regardless of anything else, I know I am good at what I do. I mean in this whole dating thing. Am I really letting myself be open enough to meet someone? What makes you marketable in this thing we call dating?
And I only have a few hours to find out, because tonight is Tubav (Jewish Valentine's Day) and I am heading out to a singles event with my friend E so who knows what could happen!
Monday, July 26, 2010
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4 comments:
I read his comment and thought he was referencing you in terms of dating!!! I was so confused!
I think for some people it just takes a long time to figure out what it is what they want in someone. Even though I thought I was ready, I can honestly say 3 years ago I was not ready for a relationship. And you are marketable...just waiting for the right buyer!
Honestly, that guy sounds like your typical 'Wall Street' stuck-up guy. I deal with a lot of them here at my work and they think they hung the freakin moon(drives me nutz).
Anyhoo.. you are marketable..I was telling a friend the other day - it really takes two people who are at the same points in life, that come from similar backgrounds and have many of the same interests. It's all timing -- again, I met my hubby on a random night out at a bar. ;)
Just saying something like that to you suggests he's the one who's not marketable. What a jerk--don't even think about what he said; his words aren't worth a millisecond of your concern. He might be one of those guys who takes pleasure in putting people down.
I often wonder the same thing about myself. Am I approachable? Am I getting caught up too much on little things, etc. etc. One can drive herself crazy with questions like these. I agree with MCW. If you are trying and putting yourself out there regularly then you are most definitely marketable. You just haven't found the right one yet. Hope you are matched with someone better next time!
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