I recently went out with some girlfriends to celebrate a be-lated birthday as well as see the new engagement ring my old roomie was sporting (sidebar: K, that ring is fabulous as are you and L, Mazel Tov!!!).
Anyway, thanks a few lychee martinis at $5 a pop (cheapest drink I have had in NYC for a while) and a yummy happy hour the topic turned to dating in this big bad city. Now, I have shared with all of you the top things I am looking for in a partner. But what are some of the things I am not looking for? That became the topic of conversation on this evening, deal breakers, things that just would rub you so the wrong way you can't be with that person.
One of the girls there that night shared the following dating story about her deal breaker and she was kind enough to allow me to share it with you. SG (single gal) had been dating DB (deal breaker) for a little while. They liked each other and were just having a good time when DB shared a little tidbit of information that started to run SG the wrong way. He explained his penchant for returning things to the store. Not just things that had never been used, but everything! Now, I will admit that I have done this to a degree. Sometimes I will read a book so fast I wind up returning it to the store and just getting a new one. But this? This was a whole new level. SG and DB had had a few sleepovers in which it finally came out that DB didn't own a bed, but rather an air mattress. SG really didn't have a huge problem with that other than wondering why a grown man didn't just buy a bed. A few days later while talking on the phone DB was a little upset, turned out he got a hole in his air mattress and nowhere to sleep. He then explained that instead of going out to buy a bed, he would return said air mattress and just get a new one! that was SG's deal breaker. It's one things to return a book or even clothes (unworn), but its another to return a mattress that has been used (for more than sleeping) to a store and expect a new one.
Now, not everyone has to agree with this. Everyone has their own deal breakers. And to be honest, I am not even sure what mine are! I know some of things that would annoy me, are they deal breakers? So I have to ask, what are some of your deal breakers?
Thursday, July 22, 2010
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4 comments:
Drug use. Deal breaker. I don't really care what it is, even if it's just pot (I don't smoke...)...I can't deal with addiction of any kind. I'm surrounded by it at work every day and I need to know that the person that I come home to has got their sh*t together and can play with me, rather than sitting in a stupor on the couch! Now, you know my husband likes a good drink every now and again, being the Good Southern Boy that he is, but I've had many talks with him about what is/what is not ok. I've made it clear from the beginning that I don't care about alcohol (barring him being in said stupor on the couch), but anything else is a no-go.
What else?? Um, once when I was in college I slept with a guy for a while who peed the bed. Regularly. Now, I know that when guys are in college and drinking drinks by the gallon, bed peeing is actually not as uncommon as one might hope it would be. He never did in mine, thankfully, but I couldn't deal with the anxiety!
LMG, I'd say that one of your deal breakers would be someone who didn't like to watch tv. Not being cheeky, but I know that you couldn't be with someone that you couldn't relax in front of the tv with, if you wanted, or talk to about shows you watched...
I think a grown man having an air mattress would be a deal breaker!!!
A deal breaker for me is sports. He has to like them. For me it is just weird when they do not like them...
:-) Glad to see it made it here! :-) Still must share a number of my other lovely NYC dating stories. CRAZY!
My ex-husband smokes 2 packs a day, so smoking is a deal breaker for me. That, and being perpetualy unemployed. They need to have a job other than warming up the couch. -J
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